Showing posts with label overwhelm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label overwhelm. Show all posts

Friday, August 4, 2017

A NEW CHAPTER: HOW TO ACCEPT CHANGE

Another year, another change. That seems to be how it goes lately. You get settled in to a routine, figure things out to the point that you're actually preparing for the next school mid-year and then BAM! Change.

Last year it was that they were shifting Janice and my schedule so we only team taught half of the day. The year before that they got rid of double-block reading. The year before that we changed rooms and started team teaching. Looking back on it, I don't know why I thought this year would be any different. But really, this year is a doozy.

In the last few weeks of this past school year we found out:

  • We are no longer team teaching at all
  • We are moving from the biggest classroom in the school to the smallest (literally)
  • I will be floating
  • The district completely changed how we place students in Reading
  • I will be providing support facilitation for the first time
  • I will be teaching an entirely different Reading curriculum for the first time

So, knowing how much my ASD brain hates change, you can imagine how hard this all was to accept, and why I'm only writing about it now when the summer is nearly over.

I hate change. I especially hate change when it seems illogical to me, or if I feel that the real reason behind the change is being hidden from us. Those factors are definitely playing a role with some of the changes this year. But we did what we could to fight some of these changes (and lost on all counts), so now it's time to move on.


Disorderly Teaching - How to Accept Change




1. Ask yourself why you are resistant to this change.

Often you may find it's just that it's different and you don't want to deal with doing anything outside the status quo. If that's the case, suck it up buttercup. Some change is good. (Ironic, coming from me, I know).

Other times you will have a genuine reason to fight the change. Carefully consider if it's the former or the latter before overreacting. Then, consider if your reason for fighting the change is emotional or logical. If it's a matter of emotion, you may have to just let it go. However, if there is a logical problem which may affect your students' education etc. then go ahead and bring it up with administration. This may fall on deaf ears, but at least you'll know you did try and won't spend time later wondering what would have happened if you had spoken up.



2. Try to find good in the change.

Granted, this will only work in certain circumstances, but give it a try. For instance, I hate that I have to teach a brand new curriculum, but I am glad that the district finally recognizes a need to address phonics skills in high school for our struggling readers. It's going to take a shit ton of work to do it (and they'll probably change my teaching schedule again next year. Grr), but I know my students will benefit from it.



3. Recognize what you can and can't control.

There are two parts to this. One is the obvious step of realizing there are some thing you can't control and letting them go. But the other is recognizing that even if you can't do anything to change the situation, there are things you can do to have some control.

They're splitting Janice and I up so there's no more team teaching, but we love each other and still want to be around each other. So we decided I would float into her room, and we'll set up an office in the closet so whomever is on planning will be close by.

I'm doing support facilitation this year. I can't change that, but I can control how that experience goes. I can reach out to the gen ed teacher I'll be working with, do plenty of prep and research, and go in prepared on day one.



4. Take some time to bitch about it.

No, this is not going to do anything to change your situation or make the change go away, but it may help you feel better. Sometimes you're in a situation that you really can't do anything about and that is incredibly frustrating. Rather than keeping that frustration bottled inside of you and stewing over it for months, let it all out. Curse and complain, express all of your fears and doubts, and even cry a little. It won't fix everything but you'll feel a little but lighter once you let that all go. Just make sure you do it off campus where young ears and APs are out of earshot : p

As a bonus, letting yourself freely complain without a filter can often help you get to the root of your feelings on the matter, and help you identify what you can do to improve things.



5. Take care of yourself.

I think this is something that we as teachers often struggle with. Our entire career is built on putting our students ahead of ourselves and it can be difficult to break out of that mindset and focus on self-care. Despite that, we really should be thinking about it throughout the year and taking care of ourselves. This is doubly (tripley? quadrupley?) true when you're dealing with added stress.

This could become an entire post, or even series of posts, all by itself so rather than rambling on, I put together a Pinterest board that may help you in this area.





So I guess that's it. Sorry this post doesn't end with a magic spell or ultimate secret to take away the stress of illogical change. Sadly those do not exist, and the only thing you can really do is work through it. So I will leave you with this quote:

Disorderly Teaching - How to Accept Change

Saturday, November 26, 2016

ASPERGER'S AND MANIC EPISODES

I'm really curious to know if people with Asperger's get manic episodes, or if it might be tied to ADD? Either way I'm in one right now.

Asperger's and Manic Episodes - Disorderly Teaching


When most people hear the word manic, they think manic-depressive or bipolar. Thankfully that is not me, but I do still occasionally (read: every few months) will have a manic day. That usually means I'm hyper, super gung-ho about getting things done, and can't focus on one task at a time.

Today I woke up to check some of Amazon's black friday deals and ended up just staying awake. A coupon for $10 off a book purchase (good through November 28, 2016 at 02:59am EST) led me to hours looking through reviews and excerpts of a number of books in my wishlist about Autism in Women, and neurodiverse relationships (and going into archives of numerous blogs). At the same time I was trying to clear shows from our DVR, do laundry, clear through my desks, find receipts for Kellogg's rewards before they're too old, working on a T-Shirt design for our Autism Speaks Walk, clearing stuff off the stairs, and considering making new dog beds. Somewhere in there I ended up reading an article about artificial sweeteners, taking an OCD quiz, looking into a new planner, and depositing a check. Also on the agenda for later in the day was hanging shelves, putting up our new microwave, setting up my dogs training collar, setting up the new Keurig, and cleaning the bedroom. Plus, you know, maybe eating and such.


Asperger's and Manic Episodes - Disorderly Teaching


It was way too much. I could feel myself trembling with anxiety and also eagerness. I was an accomplishment machine! Except I was bouncing between stuff like a mad woman. When Ki woke up I just started babbling at him about random things, while he noticed the after effects of those things, like the half folded laundry, the dog bed covers sitting in a heap on a pile of boxes, and the disaster of receipts on my desk. Finally a cognizant moment struck and I started to apologize. He immediately acknowledged that I was having a manic day and gave me a good strong squeeze to help me settle.

Asperger's and Manic Episodes - Disorderly Teaching


Then I realized I had a major assignment due today and I had nearly forgotten it.

So Ki took over handing the microwave with Momo, and even did the collar, so I could focus on my stupid, stupid assignment that took hours to do. But it's okay. It's done now.

Asperger's and Manic Episodes - Disorderly Teaching


I'm still feeling hyper but have gotten a bit more focused (although Ki and Momo having "inspriational" music playing while they work on the microwave and it is amping up my anxiety for some reason. Grr). I'm trying to just brain dump a list of everything on my mind and settle in to focus on just a few key tasks and maybe later I'll research Asperger's and manic episodes.


Update: Between writing this and looking for GIFs to add, I got over exuberant about going to measure something, tripped, and almost face planted.

Update 2: The music has gotten louder.

Update 3: I made them turn the music down. Now I feel guilty, even if they understand. Sigh.